We all experience anger. We get angry when our feelings are hurt, when we get frustrated or are unhappy.  We get angry when things do not turn out the way we planned, sometimes like online poker, or when we are criticized or when we feel judged.

Anger is a waste of energy. It is not helpful to anyone and it may actually ruin our health.  Getting angry is not in our best interest. It can hurt or even destroy important relationships and can lead to missed opportunities. 

It is important to know and understand that life doesn’t necessarily go according to our expectations and plans.  And other people will not always behave in the way that we would like them to.

External influences are not always going to be something that we can control.  However, we can absolutely learn how to be in charge of our reactions and attitudes.

There are always going to be times when we get irritated, and everyone has, at some time tried to figure out how to prevent becoming angry.

  • It is senseless to let people and circumstances throw us off balance and negatively impact our mind and feelings.
  • It is a choice whether we allow what other people say and do to change the way we feel.
  • It is possible to remain “emotionally and mentally detached”, feeling secure in our borders and not allowing the many everyday details and events that occur to impact on our mood and make us angry. 

People do get upset and angry over very insignificant things. A small action or wrong word chosen. Perhaps not getting the reply they expected to a specific question asked. These can often lead to real anger, sometimes even physical violence.  This is totally not necessary. Life will run smoother and happier without this.  Getting onto a path of self-improvement and spiritual growth means avoiding getting angry whenever possible.

Gaining peace of mind, by calming down the disquiet of the mind is probably the best way of overcoming anger and also other negative emotions.

Allowing anger to get control of you is totally unhealthy. 

How to Get Rid of Anger and Resentment

Investing some time and energy into getting rid of anger will bring about positive rewards. Peace of mind will help to keep you calm. It helps in reducing anxiety and negative thought patterns which can lead to anger. Peace of mind will help you manage those difficult situations.

In order to master Peace of Mind it is important to develop an attitude of emotional and mental detachment. This will help with reducing and/or avoiding anger.  Detachment is letting go of negative thoughts, not dwelling on negative events, letting go of feelings of guilt, and most importantly, to stop taking things personally. Detachment leads to an attitude of common sense and ultimately leads to peace of mind.

12 Tips

Along with the above, the following 12 additional tips can also help in dealing with anger.

  • Spend a few moments each day thinking about how nice life would be without feeling angry.
  • When you begin to feel angry, stop and take a few deep breaths.
  • When angry feelings begin to surface, start counting from one to ten. This will help to lessen the anger.
  • Eating something sweet and taking a glass of water can help to reduce anger
  • Taking a walk or doing physical exercise is often useful
  • Make the effort to be more tolerant of those you don’t like or agree with; being more patient with their differing opinions.
  • Know that everyone is entitled to think what they think. You can disagree with them with patience and consideration.
  • Choose to respond peacefully in all situations. No matter how many times you lose your patience, try again.  Try to visualize yourself responding calmly in difficult situations.  This will help to retrain your mind to behave in this new way.
  • A positive attitude and using positive thinking will make it easier to ignore remarks or behavior which may cause you to become angry. A positive attitude makes you happier and less prone to anger. 
  • Self control and self discipline are skills worth learning. They help to  delay your reactions and will help reduce anger by allowing you to choose your reactions instead of acting impulsively.
  • Don’t take everything personally or seriously.  
  • Look for reasons to be positive.  This will make you happier in life. A little   detachment will help you to stay calm and be less affected by others’ behavior.  Try to smile a lot and find things to be happy about.  This can help to reduce tension in you and those around you. 

By developing these skills and using these tips to help you manage your anger, you will see how your relationships and life will greatly improve.